Everyone who knows me knows I don’t like to toot my own horn. However, I’m kinda getting tired of people asking “Who the fuck is Dusty Smith?” Apparently my immense modesty has prevented people from linking me to my vast body of work. So for those of you wondering who the hell I am, I’m the guy who got Barack Obama elected.
Now, I don’t know if you guys remember this, but there was a time my good friend Barack (who I’ve called “Rackie for years) was down in the polls. The problem was, despite their best efforts, the Democratic party just couldn’t get enough young people to go to the polls. They tried everything they could think of. They even had P Diddy out there telling young people if they did not vote, they would die. But threatening young people with murder still wasn’t enough to make them vote.
So, one night, I’m sitting at home watching an old rerun of Friends when the phone rings and it’s Rackie. He wouldn’t admit it, but I’m pretty sure he had been crying. He said, “Dusty, you have to help me. If we lose the youth vote, we lose the country.”
- My good friend Rackie.
At that moment, I knew exactly what Tom Cruise meant when he said, “When you’re a Scientologist, and you drive by an accident, you know you have to do something about it, because you know you’re the only one who can really help.” Except replace the word “scientologist” with “Dusty Smith”, and replace “accident” with “Barack Obama’s Campaign”.
I knew I had to do something, because I was the only one who could. And so that night, I sat down and wrote the mega-hit “Talking Points” in which I am making available free for download right here. Click here to listen to “Talking Points” or Right Click and select “SAVE LINK AS” to download.
Yes, I’m THAT Dusty Smith. Now you know.
Of course, you already know the rest. “Talking Points” went on to unite the youth in a way that the world had never seen before. Barack Obama went on to win the presidency by a landslide 1.4 billion votes and 100% of his votes came from the youth.
I’ll never forget election night. Right before he walked out on stage to give his acceptance speech, he gave me a call and said ” Michele and I are about to walk out onstage. She is wearing the ugliest red dress you’ve ever seen. I’m not sure what they are thinking dressing her like that; but anyway, I just wanted to call you before I went out there and say thank you, Dusty Smith, for being directly responsible for me winning the presidency.”
And I said “No problem Rackie. Let’s just say you owe me one.”
So the whole point of this post is this, I’ve got a HUGE favor coming to me, can anyone think of anything good to ask for?
- You’re welcome buddy.
You could do us all a favour and force him to hire a fashion consultant for his wife. P.S. I’m pretty sure it was the gays, the Jews, and Satan (or combination of all 3) who actually got Rackie elected.
That’s a common misconception. While the gays and Jews did help a little, it was mainly me, (and of course, Satan as well).
LOL @ “You’re welcome buddy”
I look forward to the “HUGE favor” =P
Personally, if I were directly responsible for Rackie getting elected (and I did my part by rolling my eyes audibly every time that other nutjob opened her mouth), I’d ask for a permanent waiver of having to pay income tax and at least two weeks in Hawaii, all expenses paid by the DNC.
It’s the least they could do, really.
Goood , Now when things go terribly terribly wrong , we all know who to blame. LOL
“when things go terribly terribly wrong” ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Awesome. Because president Bush turned over a perfect situation of sunshine and lollipops. Not a Depression and Two unwinable COIN wars…
Fortunately since President Hussein is a devout muslim allah will save the US!
who said anything about Bush?
Ron Paul was the only rational and logical choice….Any vote for anyone else was a fool.
I’ll take full responsibility for whatever Rackie does, because after all, I am fully responsible.
If Ron Paul had been elected we could go to the liquor store and buy premium grade Pot!
Yall foools
Don’t look at me, I actually sent him 100 bux I’ll never see again. Only politician I’ve donated to in my life.
Dusty, you are absolutely hilarious! A landslide 1.7 BILLION votes, huh? LOL!!! Luv ya!
That’s the way I remember it anyway. Perhaps I got a few of the details wrong.
Actually, the truth behind that song is that it was written for the John Kerry campaign by me over 4 years ago. Obviously it didnt do much good, but it fit so well with Obama that I recycled it for his election.
Thanks for the kind words. you’re sweetheart.
I sent Ron Paul bucks, too.
The election was rigged as usual.